Chasing Inner Stillness Instead of Chasing Your Tail
You will often hear us say: THOUGHT + EMOTION = BEHAVIOR. But what does that really mean? And more importantly, how can we begin to understand what our dog is truly thinking or feeling?
Lately, we’ve revisited our own meditation practice—something we ask of our dogs in their own way. It feels only fair. Meditation brings us back to breath: inhale, exhale. A thought arises. Inhale, exhale. A feeling shifts. A thought disappears. And in this ebb and flow, we remember: every behavior, perceived as good or bad, begins in the mind.
“The unexamined life is not worth living.”
When we start to see our thoughts as just that—thoughts, and we don’t require immediate judgement or reaction to those thoughts, the goal becomes observation: to allow a thought to pass without clinging to it. This mirrors one of the key principles in our training: non-judgmental awareness of the internal experience—both ours and our dogs'. In our training, we aren’t just managing a dog’s external behavior—we are working to understand and influence their internal state, the origin of behavior. We don’t necessarily need to know exactly what our dog is thinking, but we can observe their behavior and see the emotion behind it. And, we know that emotion was created by some thought. In other words, perception matters. Just as our thoughts and emotions shape our actions, so too do your dog’s shape their behavior. In training, we recognize that most problem behaviors are not problems themselves, but symptoms of your dog’s emotional experience. Our job isn’t to constantly suppress behaviors, but to potentially shift the emotion creating them. Once emotion changes, behavior changes. If we help an anxious dog feel safe or an excited dog feel calm, their behaviors will shift accordingly.
“Our minds are all we have. They are all we have ever had. And they are all we can offer others.”
Dogs live in a world largely outside their control: we come and go with or without them; we control when they go to the bathroom, when they go to bed, when they get to go for a walk, etc. They don’t have a calendar of upcoming events or checklists. Sometimes their families are on strict schedules that allow for easy predictions. Sometimes a normal day may have no set schedule. Things and situations can just appear in a dog’s life with no notice. Some dogs may learn to respond to these with overexcitement, anxiety, avoidance or any number of emotions that lead to behaviors that their humans would like to alter or curb altogether. We can’t eliminate every trigger—but we can give dogs tools to feel differently about them if we need to. Training teaches that emotional resilience is the foundation of behavioral change.
“We need to be aware of the suffering, but retain our clarity, calmness, and strength so we can help transform the situation.”
Sometimes we just need to help your dog feel better at that moment. Because when we help them feel better, we give the brain a different choice. A different perspective. A different potential behavior. This is why, in both human meditation and in the beginning of training, we do less—not more. Less pressure. Less reaction. Less ego. We begin there and then we can create a powerful and meaningful movement towards better behavior. Hopefully a more clarified and mutually beneficial behavior. Everyone, including your dog, enjoys and benefits from calm emotions more than overexcitement and anxiety. And, the results are more long term than a reliance on suppression and obedience. Hold space and get curious. Create moments of stillness where the brain is free to soften. Where our dog doesn’t have to “do” anything—but instead can experience something different. When we ask our dogs to settle into a relaxed state, it’s not about obedience or performance. It’s about creating the conditions in which the mind can soften. When that happens, behavior naturally changes, not because we demanded it, but because we influenced the emotional state that drives it. So as we sit and breathe—inhale, exhale—we are practicing the same skills we ask of our dogs: the ability to be present without judgment, to find calm, and to develop new patterns.
Inhale.
Exhale.
